Children are cool.They
play in the amusement park.They
run after playmates with toys.They
hug with their parents.They
breathe secrets with their dolls.They
laugh loudly.They
cry loudly.They
image the face when they grow up.They
are looking at white clouds in the sky.
Sherry,
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful line you have: they/ breath secrets with their dolls.
Great job. Why did you put the "theys" all on the end of the line? What was your intended effect?
Check out Hal's Blog. He gave the wrong address in class, but the right one is below:
ReplyDeletehttp://qinhaoing.blogspot.com/
I like your poem! Reminds me when i was a child. Except of the dolls. :D
ReplyDeleteGood job!
my dear sherry:
ReplyDeletei like ur poem because my childhood is the same as u said. But I think ur poem lacks of some rhythm. Maybe u can change some words at the end of each line.